Diet Apocalypse Soup

So, if you're like me, you are constantly hungry. One way I stave off hunger, maintain my weight, and save money is to make bean soup. It's super high in flavor, fiber, vitamins, and protein but low in sodium and fat. It's a recipe handed down to me for years and years from mine own head. It's a bit labor-intensive (takes about 3 or 4 hours), but you can do other things while it's cooking.  Also, it makes you feel like an olden-timey kitchen maid or a witch from Macbeth.

I know it's an odd time of year for such a hearty meal, but you can eat it cold if the weather is too hot. Leastwise, you will eat off it for days and days...maybe weeks or months: Hence the apocalypse reference. Here's how I do it:

Get these staples:

1. A huge stock pot. (Remember when you made laundry soap? Use that one.)
2. A ladle.
3. An iron skillet.
4. A wooden spatula

These main ingredients:

5. Four or five bags of dry beans (It doesn't matter what kind. Pick your favorites! I usually buy one of those 15-bean bags and add three or four bags of whatever bean is cheapest at the store. I like lentils and split peas. Don't buy canned beans because that's gross.)
6. Some chopped up meat (Not much. Let's say 1/2lb. I use either the lowest fat/sodium sausage I can find or else ground turkey. Meat is kinda optional. I only add it to keep my husband happy happy happy.)
7. Mustard (I like honey, dijon, or spicy, but regular is fine too.)
8. Garlic and onions (I usually use about 3/4c of minced garlic, and two onions.)
9. 1-2 cans of diced tomatoes (Or use 3 or 4 fresh ones for even lower sodium.)
10. 3 peeled potatoes (You won't be eating these.)
11. Chili powder (Or dried red peppers.)


Then choose whatever you like from the following:

Carrots, Celery, Sweet Potatoes, Spinach, Peppers,.....any vegetable (or spice) you want. You can add as much as you want as long as it all fits into the pot. Apples are a great addition because they add fiber and texture. You can also throw in any compatible left overs like chili or spaghetti sauce that haven't gone bad yet, but that you probably aren't going to eat otherwise.

Directions:

1. Empty all your beans into the pot. Cover them with water, swish your hand around in them, and dump out the excess water. You can repeat this several times. Then cover them with several inches of water and stick your pot into the fridge overnight.

2. The next day, swish your hand in the beans again and drain the water. You can wash them again a few times if you want, but eventually pour some warm water over them till there is about an inch of water above them. Put the pot (covered) on the stove on medium high heat, and bring to a gentle boil. You may have to stir a few times. Don't put it on high heat, because you risk scorching the soup. (This is experience talking!)

3. While that is happening, peel three potatoes and toss them in. This is to "de-gas" your beans. If you have a stomach of iron, I suppose you can skip this part, but don't ask me to sit next to you.

4. Once a boil is achieved, turn the heat down low. Like really low. Like almost off. Trust me on this one. Even one degree too high can scorch you a nice black layer of evilness on the bottom of your pot. Not everyone has as nice a husband as I do who is willing to scrub that off! You will let this simmer for three hours, stirring every 15-30 minutes.

5. Do another activity for two and a half hours that won't take you too far from your pot. Nap, workout, TV, read, sew, clean, pick your nose, etc.

6. During the last 30 minutes of cooking time, saute some garlic and chopped onion in your iron skillet. Then, add some meat. You can either microwave your meat ahead of time and drain the fat, or you can just use something low fat like turkey and brown it in your skillet. The little bit of fat in the meat will add some lubrication to the skillet. (You can add more vegetables here if you want. Sauted vegetables/fruit taste better than boiled.)

7. Once the three hours are up, remove and toss the potatoes (Don't eat them! They are full of gassy nastiness!). Then, add the tomatoes into the pot along with the contents of your skillet (and leftovers if you want).

8. Add some mustard and some chili pepper. Go easy on the pepper and careless with the mustard. Mustard is the secret to a super great bean soup, as far as I'm concerned. Also, the longer chili pepper boils, the hotter it gets.

9. Simmer all these ingredients for another 30 minutes doing several taste tests along the way to check if you need more mustard.

All done! All you need now is some black pepper and a light sprinkling of your favorite cheese on top. Cornbread is a nice addition to such a meal. Don't be afraid to experiment with different ingredients each time.

It's fun, healthful, and keeps you full so you don't need a midnight snack. Also, if you go easy on the meat and cheese, it will clean you out like a nice yummy scrub brush.

This soup will feed approximately a million people and costs between $15 and $20 to make. Actually it makes about 30 servings, but if you add a little more water it will go even farther.

Since I live with just my husband, I end up freezing about 3/4 of it in plastic containers or freezer bags and pull one out every once in while when I don't have time to make dinner. It's so much better for you than a frozen entree at the grocery store and just as fast to reheat and serve.

If war breaks out, you're ready!